Owner:
Tim
Member

Member#: 238 Location: Registered: 01-06-2003 Diary Entries: 343
Mood: Not enough time to do it all.
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28th June 2007
Windsurfing: Brog Race Wind Direction: SW Wind Stength: F4/5 Surf / Sea State: Choppy Air Temperature: 18 Sea Temperature: 18 Weather: Cloudy Max Speed: Distance Covered:
Came 5th
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Race 9 June 28th
The day dawned with loads of wind early on. I’ve seen it all before and
was well aware that come 6.30 the wind God would yet again pull the
metaphorical Astro Turf from beneath our feet!
But on the plus side the weather forecast predicted that the wind would
stay, could we actually have some wind on a Thursday night?
The afternoon sees the Lake Manager shunting buoys around on a Primo in a
force 5. Regularly falling in as large lumps of concrete plummeting to the
deep from the back of his upturned Turtle! Resulting in buoys constantly
landing in the wrong place.
6.30 approached and still the wind blew, in fact if anything it was
actually increasing
AT LAST A WINDY THURSDAY “PRAISE THE LORD”
There was feverish activity on the shore as sails were rigged and then de
rigged as participants realised that it was getting a touch breezy out
there.
It resulted in an assortment of sizes being chosen. Big Bad Mark some how
managed to convince himself that a man of his silth like stature needed a
9.4, never mind if it was gusting 30 miles an hour.
Jonathan first rigged an 8.5 only to be severely mashed, so came in and
definitely over compensated (he’ll never get that 2 metre going)
Even the mighty Hoff changed “Hey folks the Hoff has bottled out”!
But on discovering to his horror that people were actually going passed him
, Quickly came in and re rigged his big gun.
Start time approached and 17 participants took to the arena, ready to do
battle in some real wind for once.
It was soon apparent that only a few seemed to be able to hear Alex’s
hooter (that is the air horn used for starting the race, in case anyone
misunderstood my meaning)
As the start gun went only four contestants heard it and leapt out of their
starting blocks and sped to the first buoy, your intrepid reporter being
one of them. The odd thing was I came across a couple of wood be racers
cruising around the first mark apparently totally unaware that the race had
started, Mr Boulter was one of them and when I screamed at him that we had
started was heard to retort
“Ucking Hell!” (Not sure what ucking hell meant, then it’s always
possible that I lost a letter in the wind)
As the leaders in the shape of Sig, Big Bad Mark and Tony rounded the mark
they were greeted with a very strange sight, for back at the start line the
rest were all just milling around having a chat, oblivious to the fact that
the race had started
“Do you come here often?”
“No only on a Thursday, .....You?”
“Yeh quite often if there’s wind, should be a good race today “
“Have you heard any start Guns?”
“Nope”
Suddenly it dawns On Chris that three racers were bearing down on him
“Jesus they,ve started!” Not only that but they had nearly finished the
first lap.
He flings his soup plate into gear and heads for the first mark. At last
the penny drops as the leaders flash past in the opposite direction and the
rest of the herd set off in pursuit (is a group ,of windsurfers a herd, a
flock or something else? Suggestions please!).
Now all hell lets loose at the first mark, as the pursuers round it all
together. Sails smack into the water with resounding bangs and onlookers
on the bank are treated to a windsurfing version of Tchaikovsky’s 1812
Overture!
I now have to report on the race as it developed, I felt that as I have
always reported this from a sailors prospective it was time to get a
another angle on the proceedings. i.e. from a fishes point of view. With
this in mind I watched most of the race from the water, conveniently
placing myself at each mark as boards and fins that sometimes passed
alarmingly close, whipped by me. (For the short period that nothing
happened I counted tadpoles to pass the time)
It was total chaos up there, people still crashed on a fairly regular
basis, though over a more scattered area now , giving old Tchaiko’s
overture a more dissipated performance.
It was almost impossible to give you a detailed progression of the race
especially from my new angle of perception down here. I was aware that the
Hoff in his usual inimitable style was striding out in front with David
Tiffen cracking on just behind, SIG was hanging in their as was John Andel.
Mark had discovered that maybe a 9.4 was just a touch to big and retired
gracefully, maintaining that he was balked by some bloody reporter lying in
the drink!
Keith had had his uphaul knobbled before the race (allegedly) and spent
most of the race at the top mark trying to tie it back on, not helped by
the fact that there was considerable chop due to all the crashing going on
around him.
The Hoff in a moment of reckless abandonment had the sheer audacity to
shout Starboard at Sandy Paws. Has the Hoff got a death wish we didn’t no
about? The fact that he came out of the proceedings with all his limbs in
tact I find quite amazing!
Now one thing I did note from my watery position, there were a few boards
that considered that if you got near a mark that was good enough, tacked
and set off back the other way.
To explain the laws briefly. A slalom course is a figure of eight . YOU
GYBE AT EACH MARK.
Next week I will name and shame offenders and you could well find hoards of
angry windsurfers outside your house spraying graffiti . You may even find
it necessary to move! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
I can’t really tell you much more, I reluctantly feel that maybe the
fishes eye view had its limitations. Added to this it is now a proven fact
that windsurfers can’t count to six. If people finished after 6 laps we
might have some idea of positions. But no. One idiot decides to do an extra
lap (Just in case) and the rest of the bloody sheep follow him. Some guys
did ten laps (CAN’T YOU BLOODY COUNT?)
Poor Alex had no chance of seeing where everyone had finished
There will be a seminar held over the winter months a six week course on
how to count to six!
I do know that the Hoff completed the course ( 5.3 miles) in 1st place with
David Tiffen on his first outing this year taking 2nd. Old Siggy held onto
3rd while John Andel had a stormer in 4th. After that it all gets a bit
cloudy metaphorically wise.
I THINK Tim Davies took 5th . John Boulter pulled up through the fleet to
6th place While Chris hung to 7th position, Mike Milnthorpe had his best
race yet taking 8th a Fish called Wanda, namely me swam in 9th. While Joe
took 10th (free of her rival that was saving herself for Vass) sailing
beautifully proving her most improved windsurfer award was no flash in the
pan. 11th came Dave Skye while Rob took 12th. In 13th place was Simon (with
Dagger board up) and 14th I’ve got no uphaul Keith. 15th came Jonathan on
a kiddy rig and finally but of course no means least our very own Sandy
Paws
WE THANK THEE OH GOD OF THE SOUTH WEST WIND, WE HONOUR YOU AND PAY
HOMAGE
Well anything’s worth a try!!! See you next week
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